


In Vino Veritas

by TetrodotoxinB



Series: A Close Shave [2]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Alcohol, Genital Shaving, M/M, Masturbation, Mutual Masturbation, The Author Regrets Nothing, Truth or Dare, Twerking, discussion of porn, please for the love of all that is holy don't shave anything while drunk, resolution of pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-31
Updated: 2017-07-31
Packaged: 2018-12-09 03:12:36
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,978
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11660430
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TetrodotoxinB/pseuds/TetrodotoxinB
Summary: When Thor learns of Midgardian drinking games, he shows up in Steve's quarters with Sam, Bucky, and Asgardian mead. But what seems like an innocent, if raunchy, game of Truth or Dare, may be more than either Steve or Bucky were expecting.





	In Vino Veritas

**Author's Note:**

> Beta'd by [brideofquiet](http://archiveofourown.org/users/brideofquiet/pseuds/brideofquiet). Many thanks for your continued assistance.
> 
> This was inspired by having to help my husband shave his balls for his vasectomy. The writing of this was enabled by everyone on the SBB slack. You're all terrible people and I love you.
> 
> If you enjoy this, feel free to subscribe to the series because there will be at least more.

“My friends! I come bearing the finest Asgardian mead that the son of a king might procure. It is a night for revels!” Thor declared as he followed Bucky into the apartment. 

Bucky dropped several bags of takeout on the dining table in Steve’s kitchenette. “Yeah, and I brought some Yuengling for you, Sam.”

“Thanks, man. I didn’t wanna die of alcohol poisoning tonight,” said Sam as he grabbed one of the bottles from the table.

Steve grabbed some glasses from the kitchen and brought them to Thor who added a splash of the alcohol to their glasses of coke. Bucky and Thor each took a glass and everyone raised their drinks in a mock salute before taking a swig.

“So, Thor. What calls for revels tonight?” Steve asked.

Thor shook his head with a smile. “Nothing. I did, however, learn of a drinking game you Midgardians have. Clinton was regaling me of ‘Truth or Dare’ and I wish to try this. We have many drinking games in Asgard, but most of them involve violence, magic, or animals which do not exist in your realm. This seems a safe, yet entertaining, alternative.”

“Man, we could just play some beer pong,” Sam suggested.

“If that is your wish. Clinton also explained this game to me,” Thor replied.

“No, no, Sam. The man asked to play ‘Truth or Dare.’ It’ll be a cultural experience,” Steve argued. 

Sam shook his head and took another drink. “Alright, but nothing weird.”

“Weird?” asked Thor.

“Sexual,” Sam clarified. “I ain’t about to be touching anybody’s dick tonight.”

Thor nodded. “This seems wise. I would not want this game to cause undue harm to our friendship.”

“So who goes first?” asked Bucky.

“Man, ain’t none of us even tipsy yet. Give it a bit,” Sam shot back.

Bucky shrugged and finished his carton of lo mein while Sam settled in on the other end of the sofa. 

 

“This seems a reckless endeavor," Thor declared after his third cup of coke and mead. "You mortals are so puny and fragile. Why would you chose to swim with such a dangerous animal?” 

Sam laughed. “Man, I don’t know. You won’t catch a Black man doing stupid shit like that.”

“Didn’t you have to do ocean training or something for the PJs?” Bucky asked.

“Sure we did, but it wasn’t any of this swimming with sharks bullshit. That had a purpose. This is just sensationalist nonsense,” Sam replied.

“I’m with, Sam. This is stupid,” Steve declared.

“Oh, look at you being all judgey about other people’s choices,” Sam snarked with a drunken little head wobble.

Steve sighed. “All I’m saying is that if this weren’t staged, those sharks would eat him. I don’t think I could swim fast enough to get away.”

“Yeah, but Phelps is an Olympic swimmer,” Bucky argued.

“Yeah, well, there’s a reason we’re not allowed in the Olympics, Buck. You know we could kick their asses without even trying,” Steve pointed out.

“Well, Steve’s cursing. I think we’re sufficiently drunk for this game,” Bucky declared, jamming another fistful of popcorn into his mouth.

Thor grabbed the remote and turned off the TV. “I believe Steven gets to begin the game as he is our host tonight.”

Bucky and Sam mumbled their agreement.

“Alright, let’s start with Sam. Truth or dare?” Steve asked.

“Truth,” Sam decided.

Steve nodded. “What was your most embarrassing sexual experience?”

Bucky giggled and took another drink from his cup. “Yeah, tell us, Sam.”

Sam glared at Bucky and then back at Steve. “Way to dive right in, Rogers. Jeez. Alright, my worst sexual experience was in high school. I went to junior prom with a girl named Pamela. She and I got some bootleg whiskey from this old dude who lived down the way. We skipped the after party and got drunk with a few of my friends and then me and her snuck off to a bedroom. She didn’t want to lose her virginity so she offered to suck me off, and shit, I was sixteen so I said ‘hell yeah.’ First thing she does is dive on my dick like she was dying of thirst and she instantly threw up all over me. It was on my tux and down the front of her dress - just everywhere - and then we still had to get out of the house and I had to take her home. There were a lot of uncomfortable questions from her dad.”

Bucky, Steve, and Thor were howling with laughter by the time that Sam finished.

“That is indeed consummately embarrassing,” Thor agreed.

“So Sam, who’s next?” Steve prodded once their laughter died down.

Sam looked meaningfully between the others before settling on his victim. “Thor, truth or dare?”

Thor looked as thoughtful as he could given his state of inebriation. “I shall take a dare, Samuel.”

“Twerk,” Sam ordered.

Bucky dissolved into peals of laughter and clutched his stomach. Steve and Thor just looked at one another in confusion. 

“What is this ‘twerk’ you speak of?” Thor finally asked.

“Hold on,” Sam said as he fished out his phone. “Here, watch this.”

Thor took Sam’s phone and Steve leaned over to watch the video play. Before long, Thor looked mildly distressed and Steve was trying desperately to stifle his laughter by drinking more, which likely wouldn’t help in the long run.

When he had watched the video twice through, Thor thumbed off the phone and handed it back to Sam. 

“I shall endeavor to complete this dare,” he declared.

Thor rose, a little wobbly, and moved his chair back from the coffee table to create space. With determination, and a hint of resignation, he turned his back to Bucky, Sam, and Steve.

Thor pressed his ass backwards and began to gyrate his hips and ass. In a strong voice, he began to sing:

“I’m twerking in the rain,  
Just twerking in the rain,  
It’s the ratchetest feeling  
I’m makin’ it clap again,  
These haters gonna hate….”

Thor’s singing died off and he stopped his drunken dancing. He straightened up, his hair mussed up from where he had tangled his fingers in it while dancing, and he looked over his shoulder to Sam.

“I do believe I’ve forgotten the rest of the words to that song,” he admitted.

Steve had already deposited his drink on the coffee table and was doubled over and wheezing from the force of his laughter. Sam and Bucky were both laughing but they also seemed to be admiring the view.

“Was my performance sufficient to meet the requirements of the dare?” Thor asked hopefully.

Sam choked on his drink. “Yeah, man. I think that’ll do.”

Thor nodded and sat down, looking a little flushed. “I choose Bucky. Truth or dare?”

Bucky nodded. “Dare.”

Steve found himself unsurprised. Bucky hadn’t chosen a truth yet, probably because he couldn’t remember enough before the war to be able to accurately answer most of the questions. Talking about himself wasn’t something that Bucky did unless he had to. Nonetheless he seemed to be enjoying the night so Steve reigned in his worry.

Thor clapped his hands together with a devilish smile. “Excellent. I have seen this act before in movies and I believe that it is called a ‘lap dance.’”

Bucky was already grinning, Sam was chuckling into his beer, and Steve knew he was well on his way to reviving his blush from Thor’s earlier twerking when Thor went on to say, “And I wish you to perform this act on Steven.”

Steve froze, staring at Bucky, who just smiled all sultry like and rose from the sofa. It was all fluid grace, like the way he fought, and it looked just as deadly, even with the impish grin he wore.

“I can’t very well dance on you in that chair, Stevie,” Bucky said as he snagged a chair from the dining table. “Get over here.”

Steve took a fortifying drink from his cup and put it back on the coffee table before situating himself in the chair. Bucky was standing right beside the chair looking like the cat that got the cream. Steve had to struggle not to reach down and adjust himself from the positively filthy look Bucky was shooting him.

“Comfortable, Stevie?” Bucky asked, his voice low and dark.

Steve pushed a “Mm hmm” out as Bucky settled over Steve’s lap, pressing them chest to chest. Steve’s breath caught in this throat when Bucky rested his hands on his shoulders and ground down into his lap. The eye contact was so intense that Steve finally had to look down. Unfortunately for him, he discovered that watching Bucky’s crotch rubbing down against his wasn’t particularly grounding.

When Steve looked back up, Bucky had his head thrown back like some girl in a music video. His hair was gently swaying side to side as he moved. 

Steve felt like the moment went on both forever and not long enough, when Sam cleared his throat. 

“Yeah, I think you completed the dare by now, Bucky.”

Steve felt himself flush and Bucky just smiled down at him as he stood up and went back to the couch without a word. Steve wasn’t sure how he was going to be able to get back to his seat without embarrassing himself. The lap dance had been rather… inspiring. Nonetheless, he shuffled back to his seat without any humiliating commentary, though Steve knew that Bucky was well aware of his condition since he had been rubbing all over it moments ago. 

“Now it’s my turn,” Bucky said with a smile. “Steve, truth or dare?”

Steve kind of figured that his turn was coming but he still groaned internally when he heard his name.

“Truth,” Steve chanced. He thought Bucky might ask something humiliating about the lap dance, but at the same time it still wasn’t quite safe for him to stand up, so he grudgingly made his choice. The grin that Bucky returned let him know that he was going to regret it.

“Did you, or did you not, jerk off every time I brought a dame back to our apartment?” Bucky inquired. Thor snorted some of his coke and spluttered as he tried to clear his sinuses. 

Sam barked out a laugh. “God, Steve. You’ve never had a goddamn ounce of chill. Well, I mean there was that time with the ice, but Jesus.” 

Of all the fucking things that Bucky actually could remember it had to be this. Steve sighed.

“Yeah, thanks for bringing that up, Sam. And no, it wasn’t every time,” he muttered.

Thor and Sam chuckled softly and Bucky just smiled knowingly, but warmly.

“Oh really, and which time didn’t you? The winter of ‘39 when you caught the flu?” Bucky joked.

Steve stared into his mostly empty glass like he could hide in there. “Yeah, that’d be it. We done?”

“Yeah, that’ll do, Steve,” Bucky replied.

Steve nodded. “Sam. Truth or dare?”

Sam looked thoughtfully into his fourth bottle of Yuengling. “Let’s go truth. I don’t think I could stand up too straight right now.”

“You don’t do anything straight anyway,” Bucky joked.

“Fuck you, too, man,” Sam shot back. 

“You wish, bird-boy,” Bucky laughed.

“Alright, alright,” Steve cut in. “Well, I guess that’s the dare then.”

“Hey, I said no dicks!” Sam yelped.

Steve shook his head with a smile. “I misspoke, I meant truth. No, it’s just, I thought about how you’re always trying to get me up to speed with modern life. You’ve hinted at stuff like porn and where I can find it and all that and you’ve given me pointers for stuff like where to buy toys. So I know what you think I like, but what do you look for when you’re searching?”

Bucky settled back against the couch and raised his eyebrows. “Oh, please do enlighten us, Mr. Wilson. Though pardon Steve or I if we faint. Our old hearts may not be able to take it.”

Sam rolled his eyes. “Well, that’s on you if you can’t handle it. Though I’d say Steve’s heart isn’t giving out any time soon, after what we saw with that lap dance you gave him, Barnes.”

“Shut up and cut to the good part,” Bucky demanded.

“Yes, I believe this will be instructive. A cultural exchange of sorts,” Thor agreed earnestly.

“Hell, no. We’re not exchanging anything,” Sam retorted.

Thor just smiled and Steve could see that he had played to Sam’s discomfort.

“Asshole,” Sam muttered, apparently reaching the same conclusion. “Anyway, I mean there’s a lot to look for, but it just depends on the mood. I’m an ass guy. I like thick women, so I’m typically looking for someone like that. Black women generally fit the bill better, but I ain’t picky- white, Asian, Latina - they’re all good as long as they got meat on their bones.”

“Yeah, but what do you wanna see? Anal, doggy-style, bjs - come on Sam you gotta give us something to work with here?” Bucky prodded.

Sam scowled at Bucky. “Who the hell is asking for this one? You or Steve? I recall this being his ask.”

“No, I like what Bucky asked,” Steve pressed, gesturing with his cup.

Sam sighed and rolled his eyes. “Fine. Look, I mean the stuff that they’re doing in particular is usually just based on whatever mood I’m in - so slow, rough, doggy, bjs, whatever. Doesn’t really matter to me. In general, though, I like the amateur stuff. The couples who just do it for fun, you know? They actually seem to enjoy themselves. They laugh, they kiss, and you don’t have to worry about whatever weird shit happens in studios where people sell themselves for money because they’re down on their luck or whatever. I like that. Just people being happy. That’s what gets me off. Well, that and some hair pulling, but you get the idea.”

Bucky cackled. “You’re such a fucking sap, Wilson.”

“Man, shut the hell up. I’ve seen your browser history. You just like big, blond men. What’s that say about you, huh?” Sam shot back.

“Fuck you, Wilson,” Bucky growled, his eyes dark.

Steve leaned forward, a little more fluidly than he intended and held out his hands, one still occupied by his glass. “That’s enough guys. Come on, we’re having fun, okay? Who’s next?”

Sam finished his bottle and set it on the coffee table. “Bucky, truth or dare?”

Bucky huffed lightly. “Dare.”

The question was basically a formality at this point. “Fine, I want you to let Thor do your hair all Asgardian style and shit. Braids and beads and whatever they do.”

“Excellent!” Thor boomed, clapping his hands. “Let me retrieve my comb and clasps. Give me a moment.”

Thor quickly, though not soberly, stumbled out of Steve’s quarters. Steve breathed out a sigh of relief when Thor didn’t completely snap the doorknob off. The whine of the doorjamb when he stumbled against it was less inspiring, and Steve winced at the sound.

Steve got himself a bottle of water from the kitchen and wobbled his way back to the chair in the living room. 

“So you like hair pulling?” Bucky finally asked.

Sam nodded as he chewed on a handful of peanuts. 

“Is that why you got Thor to do my hair?” Bucky inquired.

Sam stopped chewing and turned an angry glare on Bucky. He swallowed his mouthful of peanuts half-chewed. 

“Fuck you and no. I just thought that maybe you ought to have your hair all done up like the fairy that you are. You know, what with your browsing history and all that,” Sam shot back.

Bucky laughed. “I’m telling Thor that you think his hair looks gay.”

Steve blushed red again and chuckled. “He probably won’t like that. Seems like a straight and narrow kind of guy, if you know what I mean.”

“Hey, don’t judge, Stevie. The Spartans got up to all kinds of shit. Hell, so did Dum Dum and Dernier. Maybe dick is different in Asgard,” Bucky pointed out.

“Dicks are the same in Asgard as they are here,” Thor boomed as he re-entered the room, comb in one hand and metallic clasps in the other. “Though, dicks are generally bigger in Asgard. Why do you ask?”

Steve’s blush crept down his neck as he laughed. Sam was laughing and shaking his head.

“We were just wondering about whether or not you liked dicks. Mostly because Sam says your hair looks gay,” Bucky happily informed him. Sam punched Bucky in the shoulder but Bucky just snickered.

Thor nodded gravely, as though this information and cultural understanding informed some deep level of diplomacy. “I do indeed ‘like dicks,’ as you put it. Many warriors celebrate victory in battle with the knowledge of the flesh of their shield-brothers. Nevertheless, my hair is not ‘gay,’ as I understand the meaning of that word. My hair is quite manly, as Bucky’s will be shortly.”

Thor dedicated himself to his work and Bucky obligingly tilted his head as requested while Thor worked. 

“Well, I’m gonna go ahead and challenge Steve again while Thoreal Paris works his magic,” Bucky hummed.

Sam laughed and knocked his foot against Bucky’s. “That’s a good one. I’m impressed. I don’t think Steve got it. Did you get it, Steve?”

Steve looked between the three of them, and finally shook his head.

“It’s a joke about hair care products,” Bucky informed him. Bucky cut his eyes to Sam and frowned. “Man, he doesn’t know anything. I left him with you for two years and you couldn’t get him to watch some cable or something?”

Sam shrugged. “Man likes his library card. What’d you want me to do?”

Bucky rolled his eyes. “Steve’s always been a difficult little shit.”

“I’m right here, Bucky. I can hear you,” Steve reminded him.

Bucky grinned and kept going. “Sometimes you just gotta force the matter,” he informed Sam.

“You think I haven’t learned that yet?” Sam scoffed.

“That’s probably true,” Bucky conceded. “At any rate, it’s time to choose, Steve - truth or dare?”

The last truth hadn’t exactly gone in Steve’s favor. “Dare,” he decided.

Again, Bucky grinned deviously. “Go shave your crotch and report back.”

Steve froze so still that, for a moment, he didn’t even blush. Then, once his brain caught up, his face felt like it was on fire. “You want me to what?” he choked out.

Bucky grinned even wider. “Go shave your crotch. Make sure to get your balls, too. And your asshole. Be thorough.”

It took a moment for Steve to realize that Sam was howling with laughter and redder than even the excess beer could explain. 

“You mortals have strange traditions. Why you would remove the hair from your genitals is still something I struggle to understand, even though Jane prefers it to be thus,” Thor interjected very seriously.

Steve very deliberately set his glass on the coffee table, not thinking too hard about Thor’s manscaping, and looked at Bucky.

“You can always chicken out and take the second dare, but I doubt you’ll like it any better,” Bucky offered.

If anything had ever sounded like a threat, it was that offer. Steve shook his head, stood up on wobbly legs, and plodded off to the bathroom. 

He surveyed the available options and lined up a safety razor and some shaving cream before shucking his clothes and carefully stepping into the shower. At least he could wash the evidence of his drunken shame down the drain after he was done. 

Immediately after he began, Steve realized that safety razors were not meant for this. He rinsed his crotch off to get the shaving cream out and grabbed the beard trimmer. His success was far greater with the electric razor and he quickly got everything down to a manageable length. 

Another application of shaving cream, and Steve started in on the dangerous bit. Somewhere in his mind, he knew that shaving while drunk, and shaving his genitals no less, was a supremely terrible idea. He hissed as he nicked the base of his dick with the razor. Suddenly, he had the awful realization that he would have to shave his balls. He tried to pull his skin taut enough to shave but he needed two hands for the endeavor and thus couldn’t hold the razor. 

It took one more nick, this time behind his balls, for Steve to decide that he couldn’t complete this dare, at least not while drunk. 

“Buck!” Steve shouted from the bathroom, while he rinsed off the shaving cream.

“Yeah,” came the much quieter response from the hallway.

“I can’t do this. I keep nicking myself and I can’t see what I’m doing,” Steve explained, toweling himself off. “I’m just gonna wash up and come out.”

Bucky chuckled softly. “Well, I don’t want you hurting yourself. How bad did you get yourself?”

“Eh, not too bad I don’t think,” Steve answered. “I can’t see one of them, but it doesn’t matter. It’s probably already healed.”

“Steve,” Bucky said with worry. “Let me have a look. I won’t poke fun, I promise. I just don’t like the idea of you hurting yourself. I gave you the stupid dare, after all.”

Steve could see his own blush now that he had a mirror. “Yeah, alright.” He never could turn away Bucky and that earnest voice.

The door clicked open and Bucky slipped in quietly. “Show me what you did.”

Steve took in Bucky’s hair. Braided from the temples and held back with a thick silver clasp. There were small beads and cuffs woven into the braids alongside his head. He had to admit that Bucky did look pretty regal.

Bucky prodded Steve into motion with a gentle nudge of his foot and Steve sat on the toilet, the lid closed. Awkwardly, he held his dick over to the side. “I got myself there-”

Bucky hissed in sympathy.

“-and back behind my balls,” Steve finished.

Bucky gently pushed Steve back to lean against the tank and squatted down. “Lift ‘em up, Stevie.”

Steve obeyed and blushed as Bucky gently touched over where the small cut had already healed.

“Looks fine,” Bucky declared.

Steve sat up and swallowed. “See? Told you it would be.”

Bucky rolled his eyes. “I just wanted to be sure.”

Steve nodded and swallowed again. He could feel himself stirring at the attention and he was abruptly reminded of his reaction to the lap dance earlier. He felt guilty about enjoying it to quite the extent that he had.

“Bucky, I’m sorry about earlier, with the lap dance. I didn’t mean for it to get weird.”

Bucky shook his head. “It was fine. I was grinding on your dick. I would have been surprised if you hadn’t gotten hard.”

Steve nodded, relieved at the natural way Bucky brushed it off, and then looked up. “Did you? Get hard, I mean.”

Bucky sat back against the edge of the tub. “Yeah. I hadn’t been all over someone like that since before the war. Didn’t take much.”

Bucky smiled slyly and pointed a wobbly finger at Steve. “You liked it, didn’t you? That’s why you asked.”

Steve could see his blush creep down his chest and he tried to shake his head, but Bucky was already struggling to his knees in front of Steve.

“Don’t be ashamed, Stevie. I liked it, too. Sam wasn’t wrong about my porn preferences, you know.”

Steve’s heart pounded in his chest and slid down to the floor in front of Bucky. “What are you saying, Buck?”

A faint blush rose on Bucky’s cheeks and Steve knew they were finally talking about something serious. Bucky didn’t blush unless he actually cared. Steve didn’t really know what to say, but in lieu of words, Steve raised a hand and touched Bucky’s cheek. It was apparently all the invitation that Bucky needed because Bucky wrapped his arms around Steve, lacing his fingers in Steve’s hair and pulling him forward hard.

Bucky’s lips were soft, a sharp contrast to the scruff of his beard. The dual textures were electric though, and Steve gasped.

Without prompting Bucky stripped out of his shirt and pressed his chest against Steve’s. The heat was overwhelming, the skin-to-skin lighting up every nerve on his body. 

“Fuck, Stevie. I’ve wanted you like this for years,” Bucky moaned as Steve bit his way down Bucky’s neck. 

Steve moaned his agreement and rubbed his erection against Bucky’s pants. Bucky didn’t have to be asked twice and he let go of Steve long enough to fumble off his belt and work his pants down around his thighs. When he pressed back against Steve, their dicks rubbed together and Steve moaned loudly.

“Fuck, Bucky. God, we oughta get drunk more often,” Steve muttered.

“Mmm,” Bucky mumbled against the line of Steve’s jaw. 

“Fuck!” Steve moaned as Bucky took both their dicks in hand together and began to stroke.

As worked up as they both were, it didn’t take more than a minute before Steve, and then Bucky, were moaning their orgasms into each other’s mouths. 

Steve sunk back onto his heels, as did Bucky, and they pressed their foreheads together, their chests still heaving. 

“Are you gonna regret this in the morning?” Bucky finally asked.

Steve shook his head and then paused. “The shaving, yeah, but not the kissing or the fucking.” 

Bucky laughed and gently shoved Steve with the hand that still rested on his shoulder.

“We should get dressed. I have guests in my apartment,” Steve stuttered as he suddenly remembered.

Bucky laughed and knelt up to resituate his pants. “You think they heard us?”

Steve turned a shade of purplish red, his eyes wide. “Shit, I hope not.”

He dressed with haste and urged Bucky out of the bathroom and back down the hall to the living room. 

Sam was sitting on the floor between Thor’s thighs. Thor was kneading Sam’s shoulders and Sam was moaning wantonly. 

Bucky cleared his throat as they came into the room.

“Hey,” Sam greeted languidly. “You boys have fun shaving Steve’s balls? Sure sounded like you did.”

Sam and Thor both giggled.

“You heard us?” Steve gasped.

Sam snickered and elbowed Thor’s calf. “See? I told you it would work, didn’t I?”

Thor nodded and chuckled. “You did indeed tell me that this would work, Samuel Wilson of Harlem.”

“What would work?” Bucky asked, glancing between Steve and the two of them.

“That we could get you to spill,” Sam explained with a grin. 

Thor roared with laughter. “We heard nothing, but Sam thought it expedient to imply that we did to illicit a response! Ah, this is most excellent! You two have been pining for one another for some time now. I’m glad to know that tonight was not in vain.”

“Wait, WHAT?” Steve squawked. “What do you mean ‘tonight?’ Did you plan all of this?”

Thor beamed. “Aye, that we did. The lap dance was planned, though you two did more with your questions and dares than we could have.”

Bucky giggled for a moment before throwing his head back to laugh. “Fuck, Steve. They got us good.”

Steve couldn’t quite believe it. He hadn’t figured out whether to laugh or go hide in humiliation, when Bucky grabbed him by the hips and hauled him around. 

“Well, we can’t unring this bell, but I know what we can do. How about we kick them out and make the best of the serum. I know got at least two more in the chamber. How about you?” Bucky asked with raised eyebrows.

Steve felt himself warm down to his toes and he nodded. “Yeah, I probably do, too.”

Bucky ran his fingers just under the hem of Steve’s shirt and he shivered at the contact. Bucky grinned. 

“Sam, Thor, it’s been great. Now get out,” Bucky directed without taking his eyes off Steve.

Sam laughed and Thor chuckled deep in his chest. “Yes, let us go, Samuel. I would be glad to continue to massage you while we watch a movie with Clinton and Natasha.”

“Alright,” Sam agreed. “Make sure to use protection,” he called over his shoulder as they stumbled their way out of the room.

Once the door clicked shut, Bucky pulled Steve in for another kiss.

“You wanna take this to bed?” he murmured between kisses.

Steve nodded frantically and pulled at Bucky, leading the way. 

 

“Morning, Buck,” Steve mumbled into Bucky’s hair.

“Morning, Stevie,” Bucky slurred, his lips brushing Steve’s neck.

Steve buried his nose in Bucky’s hair and breathed. Even with the new shampoos that this century brought, Bucky still smelled like he always had and it felt like a little slice of home. 

They lay there just resting in the morning sun for awhile before Bucky spoke again. “You got any plans today?” 

Steve shook his head. “Not really. What’d you have in mind?”

Steve felt Bucky’s silent laughter where Bucky’s chest pressed against his own. “Oh, I figured you might let me finish shaving your privates. You know, now that I’m not drunk.”

Steve didn’t really know how to respond to that. It wasn’t exactly what he had expected.

Bucky interrupted Steve’s ruminations. “Jesus, you’re warm when you blush. You know that, Steve?” 

Steve chuckled. 

“Come on, let me shave you real close and I’ll show you what I can do with my mouth,” Bucky offered.

“Oh, but only if I shave?” Steve inquired.

“Well, I don’t want that stuff stuck in my teeth so yeah.”

Steve laughed and rubbed his hands up and down Bucky’s sides. Bucky moaned and stretched into the touch.

“Yeah, alright, Buck. But breakfast first,” Steve declared.

Bucky pouted. “But you could be breakfast. You realize that, don’t you?”

“Somehow, I think you’ll be just as satisfied with having me for brunch.”

**Author's Note:**

> If you are interested in the song which Sam had Thor watch (also the same song that he sung), you can watch it here:  
> [Twerking in the Rain](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gQ0IlRvT_Mo) by Todrick Hall.
> 
> I highly advise you to watch this video.


End file.
